"I made some mistakes in appointing people" -G.W. Bush

He told us this would happen! He told us. For all the people out there who were on the fence about Bush-Kerry, here is something to think about. Michael Brown was a bad appointee. He fudged his resume so that he would seem like a good choice for FEMA director, but he wasn't. He had absolutely no experience in emergency management. NONE. So for all of the people who thought that gay marriage was a 'hot' issue in the last election, look where we are now: over 500 dead because Bush gave a friend of his a job. Now I know some of them would have died anyway, but if you look at the way things were handled, you have to know that the number could have been a two didget one if buses were used to evacuate and food and water was air-dropped in. Brown actually started air-dropping food, but only after he got the idea while being berated by an interviewer. He got his best informaton from the news media, and admited to not knowing that the superdome had been used as a refugee center for over two days! I KNEW IT WAS BEING USED AS A REFUGEE CENTER! I DID! To close, here are some qoutes gathered by Roeper, of Ebert and Roeper. I have edited his comments to be a little less partisan and a little more factual. I also left out some quotes by celebrities that I felt were not very important. I am sad that this is how I start up again with my blog, but I had to say something. On a closing note; how many people would die if a lifeguard lied about his qualifications to get his job, and then kept his job for 4 years? 20 people? Maybe? He would be charged and put in jail if he was found out. Brown should be tried for about 500 counts of manslaughter.

*"I wasn't going to let a little thing like a hurricane keep me from wearing my bathing suit." -- Eva Longoria on the Video Music Awards, Aug. 28.

*"The looting is out of control. The French Quarter has been attacked." -- New Orleans councilwoman Jackie Carlson, Aug. 30. Meanwhile, President Bush was playing guitar with country singer Mark Willis in San Diego. Bush would return to Crawford, Texas, that night, for one more night before cutting his vacation short.

*"I must say, this storm is much bigger than anyone expected." -- FEMA Director Michael Brown, on CNN, Aug. 31.

*"Excuse me, senator, I'm sorry for interrupting . . . for the last four days, I've been seeing dead bodies in the streets here in Mississippi. And to listen to politicians thanking each other and complimenting each other, you know, I got to tell you, there are a lot of people out here who are very upset, and very angry, and very frustrated . . . And when they hear politicians . . . you know, thanking one another, it just . . . cuts them the wrong way right now, because literally there was a body in the streets of this town yesterday being eaten by rats because this woman had been laying in the streets for 48 hours . . ." -- CNN's Anderson Cooper, Sept. 1, directed at Sen. Mary Landrieu (D-La.), who had been complimenting fellow politicians before Cooper cut her off.

*"George W. Bush gave one of the worst speeches of his life yesterday, especially given the level of national distress and the need for words of consolation and wisdom. In what seems to be a ritual for this administration, the president appeared a day later than he was needed." -- New York Times lead editorial, Sept. 1.

*"It was chaos. There was nobody there, nobody in charge. And there was nobody giving even water. The children . . . they're all just in tears. There are sick people. We saw . . . people who are dying in front of you." -- CNN producer Kim Segal, describing conditions in the New Orleans Convention Center, Sept. 1.

*"Considering the dire circumstances that we have in New Orleans, virtually a city that has been destroyed, things are going relatively well." -- FEMA chief Brown, Sept. 1.

*"From here and from talking to police officers, they're losing control of the city . . ." -- CNN's Chris Lawrence, Sept. 1.

*"We just learned of the convention center, we being the federal government, today." -- Brown
"Don't you guys watch television? Don't you guys listen to the radio? Our reporters have been reporting on it for more than just today." -- Ted Koppel , Sept. 2.

*"Many of these people, almost all of them that we see are so poor and they are so black . . . " -- CNN's Wolf Blitzer's unfortunate description of the evacuees, Sept. 1.

*"Brownie, you're doing a heckuva job." -- President Bush, Sept. 2.

*"I'm satisfied with the response. I am not satisfied with the results." -- President Bush, later that day.

*"Out of the rubbles of Trent Lott's house -- he's lost his entire house -- there's going to be a fantastic house. And I'm looking forward to sitting on the porch." -- President Bush in Mobile, Ala., Sept. 2.

*"The guy who runs this building I'm in, emergency management, he's responsible for everything. His mother was trapped in a St. Bernard nursing home and every day she called him and said, 'Are you coming, son? Is somebody coming?' [starting to cry] And he said, 'Yeah, Mama, somebody's coming to get you. Somebody's coming to get you on Tuesday. Somebody's coming to get you on Wednesday. Somebody's coming to get you on Thursday. Somebody's coming to get you on Friday.' And she drowned Friday night. She drowned Friday night." -- Jefferson Parish president Aaron Broussard, Sept. 4, on NBC's "Meet the Press"

*"We lost everything. Katrina didn't care if you were poor or rich; all the houses look the same now." -- Mississippi resident Penny Dean, quoted in People magazine.

*"What I'm hearing which is sort of scary is that they all want to stay in Texas. Everybody is so overwhelmed by the hospitality. And so many of the people in the arena here, you know, were underprivileged anyway, so this, this is working very well for them." -- Former First Lady Barbara Bush, in the Houston Astrodome, Sept. 5.

*"Go f-- yourself, Mr. Cheney. Go f-- yourself." -- Off-camera citizen heckling the vice president during a live interview that aired on CNN and MSNBC, Sept. 8.
"First time I've heard it. Must be a friend of John, er, uh, never mind." -- Cheney's response when a reporter asked if he'd been hearing a lot of that sort of thing.

*"We finally cleaned up public housing in New Orleans. We couldn't do it, but God did." -- Rep. Richard Baker (R-La.), Sept. 8, quoted by the Wall Street Journal. Baker is denying the quote; the reporter stands by his story.

Berlin, Berlin

I am leaving Berlin on Tuesday morning, so this is going to be my last entry while I am in Germany. I probably won't be writting here at all for a while. I first have to get settled into my place out in Pennsylvania, and that won't be until the end of the Summer. I am excited to come home so I can start getting ready to go out to school and start something new, and I am excited to see my friends and family again. I will be home until the 7th, and then I am going with my mom to visit my sister on the way the State College. Then my aunt will meet up with us after she flys to Philadelphia. While I am home I am also going to visit some family up north, and maybe even drop in on the people at Waldsee. I have to finish up with my packing and cleaning, but I don't have too much left to do. I guess I will see some of you very soon. oh I also read the new Harry Potter book already: it was pretty good. I kind of just want it all to be over.

$%&!?

Right now the Israeli government is clearing out the settlers in the Gaza strip. There have been... problems. Stuff like this gets me so mad. For years the Israelis have said, "Look at them (the Palestinians). They will resort to anything to get what they want, all we want is to live in peace." Then the government told them that they were going to be the ones who don't get to live in Gaza. The response: "$%?* you, you #$%ing *#%&er! Where are the rocks! I am gonna dig in my heels and fight the police to the last man!"
Are ya' kiddin' me?
I stood up for religion a few days ago, but this time (the) G/god(s) is/are on his/her/it's/their own. What kind of people is so.. AHH! It boggles the mind. No, boggle isn't infantile enough. It 'hi ho cherry o's the mind. Give up! The only reason the world tolerates these peoples behavior is a mixture of guilt and bad Palestinian political tactics. And as far as the religious aspects, you are also (to stick to a theme) on thin ice. Holy ground? Come on. Your god is all knowing and all powerful and has chosen you as his favorite people on this earth, and he can't turn his head two inches to the left to give you a listen. He's not Batman. I will say that the Israelis haven't gotten as violent as the Palestinians, but it has been like a week. Give 'em time. I know that these people aren't the majority of their faith, but it still is very frustrating to watch. Hopefuly their own countrymen can show them the error of their ways.

Administration Schmadministration

I don't like the administration. It isn't because they do stuff that I don't like (they do), it is because they do it in a horrible way. There are two journalists who had sources telling them that the administration leaked the identity of a spy (endangering her life) because her husband wrote an opinion article that said the WMD stuff was bunk. You might remember the story. Anyway, the reporters are going to go to jail for not releasing their sources. In an amazingly alphabetical wave of legislation, Wyoming is the only state without laws protecting reporters in this situation. Can you say "State's Rights"? Way to go Republicans! Does it seem to everybody else that everything seems to have something to do with Iraq? Oil prices hit an all time high; Iraq has world's most pure oil. It seems really obvious to me that these people knew what they were doing. They knew there were no WMDs, they just wanted money. Almost 1,000 Soldiers have died since the end of the war in Iraq. It just seems like money is the bottom line. No one (who gets on the news and is taken seriously) is doing the math: Haliburton contracts+ Oil prices+Bush approval ratings (pre- vs. post 911)+Patriot Act+Military Spending= selfish government. There seems to be such an obvious conflict of interests, which leads to the "Idea of the Day"Political Appraisal/Liquidation of Assets: All politicians should have to relinquish a full list of assets by the time they are sworn into office. Including those of affiliated companies or of those of their spouse. Then the President and VP. are forced to liquidate their assets. What should not be limited to just them would be a cap on earnings while in office.

Cap= ((Assets before taking office)(interest rate)+(salary(2)))(rate of inflation)

I doubled the salary, because their spouse would most likely not earn anything in that time, and would be seen as one earning entity for the purposes. It the spouse does have a job, then replace that for the second salary amount. People should not get rich(er) while in office. It is not every person's duty to run for public office, just to vote. Those who do run should be seen as public servants. They are making a sacrifice. If you are not willing to do that, then you shouldn't be allowed to run. The one thing I would give them is their children's education: no one should be kept from public service because they wouldn't be able to put their kids through college. I solve that with public school scholarships for their children. If that is the price for a higher level of sacrifice in our government, I think it's worth it.

God's Advocate

I am going to talk about two issues that have recently been in the international media: head scarves in French schools and withdrawal of American troops in Iraq. I am not usually the defender of Religion or the republican administration, but on these two issues I don't understand what the liberal politicians are trying to gain. In France the ban on religious head scarves has resulted in 50 expulsions, kidnappings and other violent forms of protest, as well as unrest in schools and a large budget drain in enforcement. Why can't people say that one religious symbol is not equal to another? The law started when religious symbols like the cross were banned from public institutions. I understand people wanting to make rules as objective as possible, but this is not a fair comparison: a teacher wearing a cross is not the same as a student wearing a head scarf for 4 reasons. #1 The bible does not require a cross to be worn and no Christian groups require it either, while many Muslims believe that women NEED to comply to this rule to be part of their religious community #2 They are not teachers. They are students. The teachers are dispensers of knowledge and also government employees, who are representatives of government policy. A teacher endorsing a religion while in class is dangerous, but a student can believe and endorse whatever they want #3 The cross is a religious ICON. Jesus is actually on it, dying. This is a lot different than a cloth on ones head. It is one part of their belief system, not a symbol for it's entirety. #4 The scarves are also largely seen as a part of the culture of the countries most Muslim come from. We don't really need pants or shirts at school either, but the social constraints of our culture requires them. Those restraints were originally religious traditions, but are now embedded in our culture so firmly that I as an atheist ascribe to them without even thinking. Anyway, to make a long story short: Cross ≠ Scarf

The other issue, Withdrawal, is also subject to heated debate. and I say 'I don't understand why', but I do: it is political ammo. The Left sees that Bush is losing on this front, so they are willing to suggest the illogical just to make him look bad. I want George Bush to have to answer for the things he has done wrong, but not like this. A withdrawal timetable would be impossible to hold to, making us look bad every time we couldn't hold to out word, and would show people just how long to wait before starting a second wave of attack. We can't do it. The Democrats know we can't do it, and they don't care. They see blood, and they are going to take advantage. I am constantly disappointed by politicians in my own party. There is nothing else to say about it it. That's just the way it is. A timetable would coat American and Iraqi lives. This is unacceptable.

Magritte

I went to a Magritte art exhibit last weekend. Here a a few of the paintings I saw.

I had a really great time, and I bought some posters. It meant a great deal to me, and I am so glad that I got to go. I rode all night in a bus two nights in a row, and just stayed in Vienna for the day on Sunday, but it was worth it. By the way Vienna is a great city, and I hope to go back as soon as possible. It might even be a place for me to do a Fulbright year in.

Suzi Floozy B-day... roozy

here... a'ya go! I have a lot to do today, and I was gone all weekend, so I didn't do this before the actual day, but here you go.



does this mean I don't have to get any of my friends real presents any more? Hmmm...

WOnderbilt

Ryann got in to
I am so proud of her. I don't really have a lot to say about it, but she can stay in the house she has now, and there are a bunch of other advantages. As far as I know she will be studying copyright law. The school is really hard to get into, and they wanted to take ryann after a 3 minute interview. I am really excited. Yeah!!!

Missing Macs, Missing Rikerfest

I have had a hard time writing my blog lately because the updates on the computers here have a pop-up blocker that won't let me spell-check. Of course there are ways of getting around this, but I am lazy. More importantly, I am going to miss Rikerfest!!! I am going to be at Penn State, and I am going to miss it by like a week. For those of you who don't know, Pat and Jake throw a party on Jonathan Frakes Birthday (William T. Riker), and have a lot to eat and drink, and then watch a bunch of Riker centered episodes of Star Trek: The Next Generation. I have only been there once, but I didn't get to stay for very long. It just shows me how much I am going to miss by not going to school around those guys. I miss them a lot, and I (secretly) hope that someday I will still get to be roommates with Pat. Anyway, on to new idea time. I think that there should be a death-meter for the United States. It would be a list of how americans die each year that we could use during elections as a yardstick for the importance of issues. Terrorism=so many deaths, Cancer= more than that: Cancer>Terrorism. Of course this isn't a perfect idea, because all issues have to be addressed, but I think that it would be good to look at how much time and money politicians spend on different issues versus how important the 'really' are. This could be done with money too. More money is stolen by college graduates each year than by high school drop outs, and more goods are stolen by people with jobs than by people without jobs, but politicians and the media would have you believe that crime is something that has to do with poverty. That is not true. Maybe violent crime or other kinds of more visible crime, but not all crime. In 2001 16,000 people died as a result of violent crime. 5,000 People died at work, 70,000 because of product related accidents, and 11,000 from industrial waste. That totals 86,000 deaths. Many, if not most of these deaths are not the direct result of crime, but if even less than 1-in-4 is, than it is more deadly than all other crime on american soil (including 9-11). I know that a lot of this is questionable, but it shouldn't be just tossed aside. People should look at their priorities differently, and then stop being content when their politicians debate for over 15 minutes on gay marriage.

I also think that the guys from vh1's pop-up video should get a job at c-span, and go over speeches and debates with a fine toothed comb. It would be interesting to see what they could find about the stuff most politicians gloss over. Oh! They could even do Scott Mcclellen!

Accountability

I don't want anonymous comments on the blog. Maybe I am being tight-assed about it, but I feel (although I haven't written much lately) that I am pretty open here. I have written about things that are very important to me. I like that you all have apparently had an interest in what I say or what is going on in my life, but I do think it is important that all comments here are coming from people we can hold accountable for what they say. I am not upset or anything, but I did say it a couple of times already (and now it is even in the description of my blog), so I am going to delete all comments that I cannot identify who the sender is. The last things wasn't mean at all, it was a normal comment. You will notice I have also gone through and deleted other comments in previous posts. I feel like I am responsible for what is said on this blog, so If I can't tell who said something I wouldn't be able to mediate any discussion between two people if they were offended by what was written here. That is just the way it is gonna' be. If you really don't want to write who you are, you can e-mail me personally to notify me of any posts you are going to make, or stick to some kind of alias.

Now, for the fun stuff. I missed saying Happy B-Day to The ol' jakey-wakey, but I have to say that I have long since had a great wedding present for him and Jenny. It is kind of formal, and as Suzi knows, I don't like to give just one gift at a time, so I am for sure gonna pick up something else before the big day that is either more practical or more fun. But in the interest of tradition...

My 1,58692 € cents

I think we are seeing two different perspectives; that of Soldier and that of Parent. They are both partially correct. Here is my perspective (that of Friend/Voter/Potential Draftdodger). We do have a volunteer army (although this is a loose term, because not everyone can volunteer, and those who can aren't allowed to do many of the jobs unless they have that most important of all military equipment: a Penis... sorry, it's a sore spot right now. The issue, not my... you know what I mean). All american soldiers who die defending other's right to life and freedom die tragically but not wastefully. I think that as long as we fight "wars" (we usually don't actually declare war) of revenge and profit and don't answer to international courts it is hard for me to ascribe such high ideals to the american war machine (I don't mean this as a derogatory term, but I want to include more than the military itself, but also mercenaries, arms companies and politicians). According to the american government, burning oil is a human rights violation, but not torturing someone to death or killing children are not. There is something wrong with that. (sidenote: it is also against international law to kill anyone who makes or ratifies international laws). I think that our soldiers are made up of the same spectrum of people as the rest of the world. There are good eggs and bad eggs, sharp tacks and dull tacks. In the end I would say that the sacrifice is not a waste if the individual person was fighting for the rest of us. If a soldier dies in an unjust war while trying his or her best to help those involved it is not a waste, and if a soldier dies fighting for the wrong reasons in a just war then it is a waste. Dieing for hate or profit is a waste. Not because of some higher moral reason or a sense of right and wrong, but because you can't hate or profit after you are dead, while a life sacrificed for the good of others is outlived by that good.

Good sports.

I haven't been updating my blog very much lately, although I guess you all know that. I wanted to first say something about the soldier from Minnesota who died. He is one of the few opponents that I do remember. I wrestled against him once, and the match was very important for me. He was a nice guy, and a good sport.

My mother also told me that, because of the cuts in her school a teacher that I worked with is lossing her position. Any system that allows this woman to lose her job needs to be revamped. She is a great teacher, and it will be a hard blow to their school to lose her. I have admired her since the day I first stepped into her classroom- She is a role model not only to her students, but to her cooworkers as well. She is energetic and creative, and I am sad to see her go.

This weekend I went to the Hertha (pronounceced Hair-tah) game. The are in the national soccer league and were trying to get into the Champions League (the world's most prestigous league). There is a complicated system of points for wins and ties, but it came down to winning the last game. They tied. It was dissapointing, but they did qualify for the European international league (the UEFA CUP). I am strating to get swamped with homework and stuff, now that there is only about 8 weeks of school left. No fun ideas this time, I am pooped. Instead you get to look at video game trailers that just came out at E3 last week.

Peacefare

The U.S. spends a lot of money on it's military. Last year we spent roughly the same amount of money on our military as the rest of the world combined (466 billion vs. 500 billion). Don't forget that if we had spent no money (except wages, fuel and repairs) we would still be the most advanced and world encompassing military in the world. Many people want to take some of that money and put it into other programs: schools, social security, etc. I think that we need to at least try a WWJD program. I am no big follower of Jesus, but most of the people in the armed forces are. They are willing to fight and kill and sacrifice their lives for the good of others. I respect and admire that, but I wonder how that can be ok with them on a religious level. If you believe in heave and a higher justice, than I would imagine that you would be happy to turn the other cheek to those who attack you: I mean, you are going to go to heaven anyway, and that would be for eternity not just the few years we live here on earth...

I digress. Couldn't some of that money be used to just overwhelm nations with food and infrastructure improvements? I am not saying you wouldn't need soldiers to protect those assets. Many food programs were manipulated by warlords in Africa and southeast Asia. Don't just drop the food in and leave. Don't try to do it all at once. Pick a country with a coast that needs help and will, if unaided, eventually require military attention (eg. Somalia/Ethiopia; 15 years ago). Start with a beachhead and work outwards. I feel like it would be hard for any nation to get rid of american soldiers who have a well prepared base. Then feed the people. Expand slowly outwards. I am not saying do it as pacifists. Bring all the guns and whatever (I am not a soldier). Shoot people that shoot you. But start by feeding and helping. No ultimatums. No favorites. That has got to be less expensive. Sally Struthers can feed people for the cost of a cup of coffee. It isn't even Starbuck's coffee. We could cut spending by over 75% and still be the highest priced army in the world.

I see that our military has more responsibilities than any other on earth, and is also held to a higher standard (except in courts, which is a whole other rant). They need a lot of money. Fine, but the best way to save on the newest version of fighter jet is not having to build it because the people you were going to survey or kill are all at their homes EATING. Many wars are Religious and/or cultural, but many are just about water or space or food or money. Those could be stopped. It is time for America to stop responding to violence with violence. It is time to put our cheek where our mouth is.

On a side note. I am reading a book of great speches, and there is a guy who is talking about the war in Ireland at the turn of the century. He said something that I found really moving. He said that graves are war's fuel.

Don Quixote

I have a hard time understanding why there aren't set amounts of natural energy that we need to collect every year. There should be goals set, and timetables made to integrate natural energy, especially wind power, into the American infrastructure. Wind power has no waste products, and has been made very affordable through advances in the technology that runs the collectors. Their is of course the added expense of building the collectors, but I have an idea: stop subsidizing farmers who grow soybeans, lease their land and build them there. Of course you won't be actually making any more money, but you won't be paying for something that we don't use just because it would be great if we DID use it. It is an investment in our future, blah, blah, blah... but it just makes sense. I also think that we need to stop hoping that businesses will do the right thing as far as energy politics goes, and instead give them real monetary incentives. I am not saying we give them any money, but that we show them that money can be made while "being green". And here is what I propose: No lobbying, no advertisements. High-profile project transparency. Greenpeace, or "Save the Whales" or whatever (maybe a conglomerate) saves their money (by not advertising) and buys a block of New York real estate. Then you let every Rainbow, Moonbeam and Shitazoo (I assume that hippie-dippie environmentalists engineers aren't named Tom, Dick and Harry) give you ideas on what to do, to build an environmentally sound building.

Insert example: There is a guy who has a plan to cut lighting cost and energy needs. He replaced light bulbs with fiber optic cable that has one end pointing at the sun. He coupled this with a rechargeable battery and a solar panel. So when the sun is shining, you get your light pumped into your room by flipping a switch that connects the strips of cable hanging from your ceiling with the central line that points at the sun. When it is dark or cloudy you get it from the stored light from the panel. This saves money. Energy costs are cut, and after installation there are a lot fewer repairs than in a normal building. This is the kind of stuff I am talking about.

So you build this, we'll say office building, fill it from top to bottom with this stuff and then rent it out, use it yourself or maybe even invite the government to use it as a town hall. Whatever. The important thing is you post all costs on a website. Energy, money and materials going in and out should be noted and posted. Let that do the talking.

The point is that you can't get everyone at once. We are wasting too much energy trying to make the herd turn, when all we need to do is start focusing in on one individual at a time. It won't take long until more and more people want a building that runs as cheap as yours. The same can be done for household budgets: just show people how much money real people are saving with your new brand of hybrid cars. Lead by example.

Matt made me think about something: you should all use this as a space for your ideas. That way we all have people to bounce off of. I will still be posting other stuff, so I am going to stay the soul administrator, but I invite you to use the comments as freely as you want. I get notified of ever post, so if you write in an older entry I will still notice. As a suggestion I think it would be good to stick to the theme of the original idea, but feel free to suggest new topics for a new entry.

Didn't take long

Well, I am already eating my words. Howard Dean sent out a DNC poll asking who people would vote for as a presidential nominee in 2008 and didn't even put his name on it. It looks like Clinton. I am happy on the one hand, because it is time for a change, but I am also apprehensive. I do not want to see kerry or edwards back (no, my shift key is not broken). If they are on the ticket I will vote 3rd party, if only because even nominating them would show such a high level of incompetence on behalf of the party that I don't think I could vote for a democrat with a good conscience. It kind of makes me think that we didn't really deserve to win last time. I was as upset as anyone about W. winning again, but aren't we democrats the ones to blame? we saw where the hot spots were going to be, and we didn't do enough in Missouri and Ohio. I know my mom would foam at the mouth if I didn't mention that there are serious claims of voter fraud in Ohio, but it shouldn't have even come to that. Anyway, I also wanted to announce that there is going to be a little change of direction here. About half of the stuff I write in here is about my life or current events, and then the other half is just Ideas and misc. internet stuff. I just finished reading a book that was made by compiling the word prossessing documents on Douglas Adams' Mac, and it made me think. Maybe more of us should leave a record of our good ideas or musings. A lot of good ideas come from normal people. We just need to make sure they get recorded and shared. So, that said, I am going to be writing my ideas here (hopefully about one a day) until I get back to the States and have a computer of my own.

London, Baby!

I just thought I would write on mz blog while I am in London for the weekend. I saw big ben, 10 Downing Street, Westminster Abbey, the Peter Pan Statute, The Globe theater (I saw a great rendition of the tempest with only three actors playing all the parts), and a lot of other stuff. I like the city, but it isn't worth how much it costs in my opinion. Go once for a few days, but not much longer.

HBTYHBTYHBDMHBTY

Here is my virtual gift for Matt. If I was a better friend, I would have gotten it in time for his b-day, but I didn't.

Whoopie-cushionology

The Linguistics of Humor! That is what I am going to focus my studies on. I don't know when I can get started on it at Penn State, but lately I keep thinking how I never take any risks. I am pretty much staying on a path that is socially accepted. I am a part of a huge educational system. I would be lying if I said that I didn't want to give it all up and try to intern on a movie set, or try stand-up, but I am too lazy and to afraid. The other problem I am having is that I don't seem to care about the stuff I learn in class. I want to learn Spanish and Latin, but I just don't feel a spark inside me. I think the way I can compromise with the two forces that tear at me is to finally study the stuff that I like doing. I like creating funny stuff. Penn State doesn't have anyone that specializes in Humor, but there are people out there who study it, and there is a lot of literature on it, so I am excited. Right now it is still just a thought, but I am excited about it.

P.S. May 3rd is Matt's B-Day!!!
P.P.S. There is no such thing as the youth vote. I used to believe in it, but I have been burned too many times.
P.P.P.S. Voting should be done on a Wednesday, made a holiday, uniform in all states, and we should make a 'not voting tax'. All elections should be popular vote. The presidential debate committee should be funded and run by a bipartisan group (Canadian?) and entrance should be allowed to any candidate that is the nominee from party represented in the house or senate. Campaign funds should not be considered free speech, and should be publicised with names attached to every dollar... minimum number of debates.... mumble, rumble.... recount..... murmle.... transparancy.... money... voting record.... Nader... protest... and then... grumblecakes... alan alda...

NObama

I have decided to start prospecting the 2008 candidates. I did it last time and came up with a Dean/Clark or Dean/Edwards ticket, but was mistaken. I think that The fall of Howard Dean was utterly random, and could not been seen coming. If he had won the nomination, he would have come out strong enough to beat Bush because he was a better contrast to Bush than Kerry was. Dean is also a better speaker and would have had more leverage to work with in debates. So I am going to go out on a limb and call for either a Dean/Ford or a Dean/Lincoln ticket. Not Hillary. Not Obama. I am however, aware of the greatest flaw in my predictions: I not only weigh their feasibility, but also who I want to win. I like Clinton and Obama, but they are both unlikely Presidents. Hillary because of her history and husband, Obama because of his inexperience. Obama could be a VP candidate, but he won't. Not yet. Clinton couldn't be. I chose Dean, because I truly have no faith in Edwards. He brought absolutely nothing to the ticket last time, at least nothing more than any democrat would have. He is good looking and young and southern... and boring. Why Lincoln or Ford? Five reasons: #1 They are the furthest up the list of candidates that would be willing to start out in the passenger seat, and we all saw what happened last time with how much weaker a ticket is if filled by two former rivals. #2 Diversity. It is time. #3 They will ACTUALLY bring the some of the south (that's right Edwards, I'm talking to you). This criteria is what kept Russ Feingold off my ticket. He would be good, but you need a southerner if you want to beat a modern republican. #4 They have names of former Presidents, and that should count for something. This is bad news for Obama, because if they win (and let's hope they do) the next Presidential candidate would be a woman or a racial minority. I am not sure that the country will elect a black/black or woman/black ticket. He is young and there will be time for him, but I doubt it is as soon as everyone thinks.
But don't forget, my secret love is really the "big" DK!

Bring, bring.... bring, bring.... bring,BRAUGHT!

Sup Homies?! (if you read fast enough you just saw an interobang, and if you are reading really fast, you

JUST GOT DIEKED OUT. PSYCHE!!!) Yesterday I did the worlds coolest thing ever. I was waiting and waiting for this lady to help me at the book store, so finally I whipped out the cell (I am talking like this on purpose, for the record) and grabbed the business card from her desk. I then called the direct line for that phone and let it ring. She left the customer she was talking to and ran over to get it. I slyly hung up right before she got there, and returned my books! YEAH for me! On a side note, I now have all the books I need for classes, including a copied version of my out-of-print Latin text book.

Enlightenment 2: This time it's personal!

I haven't written as often in the past few weeks as I used to, but I think it has more to do with the fact that I haven't had anything that I thought was really interesting happen to me. I know what it is like to get cards or e-mails that are not really interesting except for the people who write them. I am trying to make sure that kind of thing doesn't happen here. I am getting really excited lately about the new software that is coming out recently. As you all know I am now a Gmail user, and I am really happy with it so far. It really shows how important human creativity is, even in the world of technology. The possibility to make a lot of the new programs and internet services have been around for a while: it is just that no one thought of them. I am also really excited about the new Apple operating system coming out in a few days. It has a lot of things that I really like, and the video editing software is getting cheaper and better all the time. I hope to get Final Cut express this summer and then if I can find some people over at Penn State who are half as fun to make movies with than Pat and Jake, then I might invest in a few more programs that aren't too much money (luckily the Penn State education discount is pretty good).
I just think that we are living in an amazing age. We are at a point in history where we can stop and say "history needn't repeat itself any longer" We can choose to move on. We have a global community and technology that is capable of feeding and powering the world indefinitely. We just have to change the way we manage things. There is a scale by which scientists grade civilizations:
Level 3 = Inter-stellar Travel
Level 2 = Star Manipulation
Level 1 = Global Control
Global Control means control over weather and zero dependence on fossil fuels. Most experts think that man kind will either reach this point in the next 200 years, or not at all. I think that we should feel really excited to be there while this amazing start of a new world begins. I guess the worst thing is that we have to be okay with the fact that we live in a civilization at level 0 for the time being.

Habemus Papam.

Ok. German pope. I think that the whole thing is a little dissapointing. The guy is the reason Vatican 2 failed. He is, almost by deifinition, everything that John Paul II was not. Now I am even more upset that the pope died before giving up his papacy, because he could have swayed the vote a little (or not, if you believe in the Holy Spirit: The Tito of the Trinity). The world needs a new face on Catholicism and Cristianity in general, not someone who is going to attack everybody. I can understand someone having different views on a lot of church issues, and me not being a christian doesn't give me much of a right to say what should go on in the church, but there are some issues that need to be discussed. For example: female priests. Condoms and homosexuality I can see are moral issues (for some), but women who want to preach the word of the lord? Even Jesus had that. This pope is a dissapointment, and I guess I will just have to wait until we have a new one if I want someone to look up to.
As a closing note, I would like to say that I often was at odds with the last pope. Most often my problems with him were associated with the fact that he wouldn't leave his post. He had so much courage and vision as far as the chruch went, but he himself admitted to great fear of what his life would be like if he was no longer pope. He was a great mind trapped in a body and a post that were no longer trully his to control.

Gmail

I am as of this moment using my new Gmail account instead of my U of M account for e-mail. I had a Gmail account for a while, but I hadn't gotten around to switching to it. Today I set my U of M e-mail to forward all incoming mail to my new account so you can continue to send e-mails to my old address (the new one is schn0440@gmail.com). I am really happy I did it, because I really like to keep an empty mail box and so I delete all my old emails that I don't absolutely need (the exception being my e-mail from pat about Mr. Hodge). With Gmail I can archive them and not have to look at them, but still have them in an emergency or when I realize that I in fact DIDN'T remember that 9 digit confirmation number from apple.com. The other great thing is a spell check. I need that in my more important emails. There are a lot of cool features, and I recommend it to everyone. It is still in the beta stage, but if anyone wants an invitation, I can give it to them. The funniest thing is how much trouble my old U of M account is giving me in this last home stretch: it is taking forever to forward all my old e-mails to my new account.

Latin & Boxing

I had my first day of Spanish, Latin and Boxing today. They were all a lot of fun, but my Spanish teacher is a trip. There are a lot of people who want to get into the course (178 are on a waiting list and the class is supposed to be between 20 and 25 people. She made everyone who was signed up kick people out of a seat so that all the chairs were full with people who were supposed to be there plus however many people could find a seat and keep it because they weren't asked directly to get up. Then she kicked everyone out who wasn't sitting in a seat. This didn't go over well with the people who were forced to stand up after showing up early enough to get a seat and wait for class to start. At any rate it was interesting. I think that it won't be to hard to stay on the ball in my classes this semester. Boxing was a lot of fun, but I miss Matt. The guy I sparred with wasn't the sharpest tack, so I had to tell him what we were supposed to be doing the whole time. After boxing I went to practice this weird theater thing for my class. I am not really in to it, but it bothers me when the professor does what he wants instead of what we suggest. I don't really care, but I just think that this thing is supposed to be for our benefit, not his. While I was listening to him talk I had the realization that I don't care enough: he can do whatever he wants, and I will just go along with it. I don't HAVE to be in charge of everything. It was a very freeing felling for about 2 minutes. Then everybody was looking at me for an idea. I thought to myself 'Self, don't say anything. Just wait and see how long it takes for somebody else to say something. I will just do whatever the first person suggests'. It took a long time. Anyway, I'm tired and I feel good and I am going home.

New Semester

I just had my first class of the semester. I know those of you who are in school still are just about done with classes, so it might seem kind of odd. I am really happy that things are starting up again. I met some new people already and I am excited about my next class. That is it though for this week. None of my language courses start until next week, and these two classes only meet once a week, so I have a little more time before things actually start. I walked through Check Point Charlie today, and it made me think about how cool it is to live in this city. Having something like that be on your way to class is cool. I think it is funny because yesterday I saw a German Soap Opera in which two guys went for coffee and walked past the same spot, and I thought 'who actually goes past there in their real life?'. Anyway, class was interesting and I had a lot of fun. It was German Grammar, so it is just my style.

Oh, we threw a Mitch Hedberg party over the weekend. It was a lot of fun. We only had food he mentions in his routine, and we listened to two of his CD's. I know most of you don't know who he is, but he is really worth hearing.

"I was going to whiten my teeth, but instead I just got a tan." - Mitch Hedberg (1968-2005)

Last week my favorite comedian Mitch Hedberg died. He was 37, and took a lot of drugs. He died of a heart attack, but there was no investigation as to the cause. He was an amazing talent that I admired very much, and I am proud to say that I saw him perform live in his hometown of St. Paul MN. He was just reaching a level of notoriety to be able to do more and more things in the world of comedy. He wrote, directed, produced and stared in the film "Los Enchiladas". I was really torn up by his death. His comedy was of an amazing style that tore at the strings of the world we surround ourselves with, while also exposing our collective psyche as a culture.

I also wanted to talk about the Nobel Prize. I was reading about the history of the Nobel prize the other day, and I couldn't get over how interesting the topic was. I think that would be an awesome coffee table book or something: a brief synopsis of what every Nobel Prize was given for. The Literature ones aren't always given for individual works, but for the others it is usually pretty clear cut what the prize is for. One was for the MRI, one for Frontal Lobe Lobotomy... the list goes on and on.

Football, Loving my city, Melancholy

I just watched a Berlin Thunder (American Football) game at the Olympic Stadium here in Berlin. It was pretty fun, and we won. I guess they have won the Europe Cup each year for the last three years. It was fun too see people get excited about something they didn't even really understand. Don't get me wrong; a lot of them are hard-core football people and they know a bunch about it, but there was a lot of people who didn't cheer until the announcer told them exactly what had just happened on the field. Kind of surreal in any case.

On my way home I got a really long look at the city, from the old west to where I live over in the east. I really like the city, and I love that there is so much I still have to see here.

I can't explain the melancholy, but I just feel like kind of a jerk lately. It has been a while since I have actually done anything nice for anybody. I'll be fine, but I just don't feel at my awesomest.

Boxen

I just got done signing up for my next semester courses: German grammar (with Germans, not for non-natives), Syntax (not limited to just German language), Beginning Spanish, Beginning Latin and Advanced German as a foreign Language. In addition to my academic courses I signed up at the Student Gym and I am going to take a course in Boxing. I am happy that school is about to start again: I am about out of things I can do to entertain myself. On a side note, I am almost out of money. I have to make sure that my savings holds out until my first check from Penn State arrives. I don't have a lot of expenses, but I am worried about books costing a lot for this semester, but I might be able to get away without having to actually buy them if they are all in the library. On a side, side note: libraries here SuUuck! The Roseville library is better than the best one here in Berlin, and they cost a lot of money and are super Germa... I mean bureaucratic.

Loss of Control

I go away for a week, and you people stage a mutiny. Don't you know that this is supposed to be all about me? Aaanyway. I just had a bunch of guests going in and out of my apartment, and now I am finally all alone. I hope you all had a good time over the Holiday. I was at the Berlin Cathedral for service, and the German President was also there. I was disappointed because when he got up and left only about half of the people there stood. I think that I am as much of a rebel as anybody, but I like formalities like that and I think it is a shame when people are to obtuse or lazy to adhere to them. If people were sitting as a form of protest or civil disobedience, fine. But I don't think that was the reason. It is totally warm today, and I am so happy. Spring is finally here to stay! Today is a big holiday and everyone has the day off. The same thing goes for Good Friday. Most people don't go to church in this city, so those two days off of work have become a bigger deal than Easter itself. I saw a book store that was closed on good Friday, that was open on Easter Sunday, and it is normally closed on Sunday anyway. Well, I don't have much more to say, but I thought I better post something before you people take over. (Just kidding, it was nice to hear what you said to each other)

Quality Control.

This is the point where I am going to check in with my 'audience'. What stuff do you want to hear more about? What stuff have I beaten into the ground? Which links have been your favorite? And most importantly, who is reading this, but hasn't posted anything yet. I am writing a lot in this thing, and it isn't always my forte, so I would really appreciate it if you would tell me if you are at least reading this or not. I am also writing this entry to get the painting off of the home page so that the paragraph lines up right.

Geometheology

Here is what I don't understand about god: people think that god is some perfect entity, but then they have bible stories and church decorations and even visions of the virigin mary in every corner of the globe. those things don't seem perfect to me. If god was really perfect, we wouldn't be able to interact with it, because we aren't perfect. Perfect things can't have tonsils that burst, miss three-point shots or have bad taste in music. God would need to be some kind of spherical, perfect form that we would never be able to comprehend on our plane, because we are screwed up. People always look at the god that their parents gave them, and then they compair it to the gods that other peoples have inherited and they judge them. The old gods, Loki, Anubis, Anansi, Zeus, Shiva, the Earth-Mother, Mars; they are all deemed primitive ways of interpreting natural and social phenomena. I look at the current religions and see the same thing. Floods that destroy all but the last vistages of humanity exist in Judeo-Christianity as well as Greco-Roman mythology. God's son as the saviour of mankind born from a worthy woman exists in Egyptian mythology as well. We have whole university departments that are dedicated to the study of how cultures morph and evolve, including their stories and language. It baffels me that most people don't think of religion as a part of that. They are right because they are right. they just happen to be lucky enough to be one of the small percentage of the worlds population that was introduced to the only True religion. Of all the things that these people are thankful for, they should be most thankful that they weren't born before 1 A.D. or that they weren't bron in India, China Pakistan, Nigeria, Northern Canada, North Korea, Japan, Athiest Russia, Athiest Germany, Egypt, Palestine...

...ended up inside

Today is finally a warm day! I am going to go out and play some cage soccer. Here in the city they have these cage soccer 'fields' about the size of a basketball courts. It is way better than regular soccer. I am listening to the Inaugural Address of JFK right now, and it is so inspiring. Along with the good weather, it is really inspiring. I don't think that I am going to get anything done today. Maybe a little shopping, but not much more. I do, however have a good movie recommendation: Sophie Scholl. It is a German movie, but I bet it will be in the artsy theaters there. I saw it without knowing anything about it, but I really liked it (even though the projector broke about 5 minutes from the end, and we all had to go into the next theater to watch the end, and then I just missed the last train and had to take a taxi home) .
Man, I wish you could listen to this speech! I wish politicians would talk like this today. On an unrelated matter, I found a cool pool hall in my neighborhood. I think I am going to start going there pretty regularly.

Relativity.

There are three things I want to talk about in this entry: #1. god #2. clothes #3. the cold

God: (before I talk about this topic, I need to say that I am going to argue from the point of view that Christianity is correct. I remind everyone of my happy status as an atheist now so as to be able to write more fluidly later on) I really like it when people who I know say "God bless" or other things in that strain. I don't believe that any cosmic force is going to help me out, but I do enjoy the sentiment and think that it does make a difference. It makes a difference because that person is thinking of me. God's favorite creation of all was human kind and I think that people forget that humans are the only doers of evil or good on Earth. We are god's instruments. If you pray to (G/g)od, you are really praying to those around you to do good. Words won't stop a bullet in mid-flight, but there is hope that you can convince someone not to pull the trigger. A positive attitude, comfort, aid and love can do so much to shape the world around us. We find ourselves in a world that we, and those before us built. We need to see the chain of cause and effect, and that if we aren't good to each other, god isn't going to intervene on our behalf. I feel as though Prayer is the love we have for each other bubbling to the surface. We love our common man so much that we say out loud or silently, in a group or alone, all our hopes and dreams for our fellow man. I love prayer, but I challenge everyone to write down their prayers. Make them a matter of permanence, not spontaneity, and do what you can to make them come true. Maybe god doesn't answer prayers, because the goal is for all of us to be each other's answer. Look across the table, or into the car in the next lane and try to think what that person's prayers sound like.

Clothes: I just got a new jacket. It is awesome. I am wearing it right now. That is about it about my jacket, except that it is the culmination of a long day shopping for the first time in a long time.

The Cold: It is starting to slowly get warmer here in Berlin, and the weather is getting nicer all the time, but that is not what I want to talk about. There is a guy in Germany, who has created colder temperatures than ever before. The way he did it was with heat. Well, not exactly...

(Matt Style Science Lesson)

All light has a bunch of waves that move all over the place. We see different colors because we interpret those waves on an analogous scale. Lasers, however, are a little different. Because of a light filter (like a ruby) lasers contain only one wave, so all the light coming from a laser is exactly the same color. If you aim this wave at a particle in a vacuum, then eventually it will move in the same rhythm as the wave itself. Imagine a pool with a bunch of people playing in it making waves: that is normal light. Now imagine everyone going to one side and making waves in a uniform and rhythmic pattern: that is a laser. Now imagine floating in those two pools. Floating in the first one would be pretty calm, because all of the waves would cancel each other out. Being in the second pool would be less calm: you would start to move with the waves as they crossed the surface of the water. Shooting a laser at a small cloud of particles in an otherwise empty vacuum would, after a while, make them move in rhythm with each other. Heat is caused by the constant friction between any two surfaces, be it two sticks or your soup molecules bubbling around. This goes for our group of particles as well, but if you get them to move in unison, they never rub each other. They are just like the Rockettes; they move a lot, but they never kick each other, because they move in unison and there is no one else on the stage. That makes the particles form what is called a 'Super-Atom', and they get really cold. You have to do this in the dark and in silence, so that nothing else moves the particles around. So far we can't create total darkness or total silence, so this guy can't reach absolute zero. I think that this is an awesome idea. It is thinking outside the box. This guy achieved something that others thought was impossible simply by nottrying to fight the laws of physics, and setting them to music.

Not Fishing.

Thanks for all of the kind words everybody. I wasn't fishing for nice comments, but thank you all the same. I guess I just felt like I am never with the people that are closest to me, and for you all it is one guy that is not there, but for me it is everybody who isn't here. On the up side, I am about to go pick up Suzi from the train station in about an hour. She just called me the other day to see if she could visit. So I will have her here for a while, and then two other girls are coming to stay with me on the 19th, so I won't be alone that much for a while. In my last blog I talked about how I am like my dad, but I also want to mention that I am a lot like my mom (on a side not: alot and everyone should be words). She moved a lot as a kid and taught us that you have to be your own best friend and that you have to make sure that you are happy, not to rely on others to do it for you. I think that it is a really healthy outlook. It doesn't mean that you should keep people from making you happy, but you have to know that in the end it is something that you have to work at yourself. I think that I got really good at it. I am the champ of doing nothing. I can entertain myself for a long time, and I am just afraid that I am becoming my own best friend for good. That can't be good. So maybe I should do what my mom has done to keep that from happening. She has a pretty close circle of friends: some women from work, a neighbor, an aunt of mine, in the last few years my sister, and a handful of others. They have been there for each other through so much. So, since I have to wrap this up, I send this rock'n blog entry out to mine and my mom's friends!

New and old friends.

I just got an e-mail from the woman who I will be working with at Penn State. I had a few questions that she was answering, and she signed the e-mail with her first name only. Up until now her e-mails have been signed with her full name, and she wrote very informally this time. It is a really small sign, but a sign none the less, that I am going to have a lot to do with this woman. She seems very nice, and I am not worried about anything like that. It's just that I am going to have to start building a social network all over again. I am going to have to meet her and a bunch of other faculty, along with my colleagues in the department and roommates and friends. I am sure a I will make friends, but I also realize that it will be a long time before I get to really live around anyone I know right now. Everyone that is in my life right now will have very little to do with anything I am involved with in for the next 5 years, and the people that I meet in the next 5 years probably won't have anything to do with me after that time is over. It isn't depressing necessarily, but I do feel a little sad. I think I feel that way, because, as far as I can tell, I don't seem to leave a big impression on anybody. I am friendly, and I think a lot of people like me, but I know for sure that I am no one's best friend right now. All of my friends have deeper friendships with other people. I am sure that everyone feels this way a little, and I am over-reacting, but it bothers me just the same. I am sure many of you know that I compare myself to my father a lot, and I think that in some ways we are very alike. After he died I realized that he made everyone he met feel like they were his best friend. People he worked with, clients of his, old neighbors, family and college buddies. His best friend was really a guy he saw less than once a month (although I know that he was one of those guys who also thought of his wife and kids as his best friends). I am happy that people like me, and that I make a good first impression like my dad did, but I am not exactly like my dad. I am afraid of 'growing up' and not having close friends that I see often. There are so many people who thought they knew my father, but even the blinders that I had, because I was so young, let me see that he wasn't who they thought he was. I feel sometimes like I do the same thing. I have an 'on' personality that is old fashioned, charming, polite, sarcastic and outgoing, but I also have a different personality that I am not sure everyone knows is there. Even now there are times when I hear a story about my dad and then I look over to my sister or mother and we know that whoever it is doesn't realize that they are talking about the Mark Schneider they saw, not the one that we knew. I guess I just haven't been 'off' in a long time, and I am starting to get worried that I will get stuck with the 'on' version. I miss my middle of the day movies with Pat, or building something/solving something with Matt, or Suzi noticing my little ticks and knowing my secrets. It is times like those when I am really me. I miss that.

DONE!

As many of you know I just made my final decision. I will be attending Penn State next fall. I know I am giving up a lot, but when I looked over the acceptance letter and saw that I only got in to the Teaching English as a Second Language section of the department, I realized I wasn't going to go there and get a degree in something that I didn't want that badly, if it was going to cost that much Money (capital on purpose). I was really glad to get in to Georgetown, and now that I have decided I fell a lot better about going to Penn State again. I will just have to concentrate on make new friends right away since I am not going to know people there. For those of you who noticed a now commenter: that is Ryan Voss a great friend of mine who lives in the DC area. I was really looking forward to living near him, but I will just have to accept his offer to visit and let that be enough.

Good news, bad news.

I got in to Georgetown! They gave me no money! I don't know what to do. I guess I will have to figure it out soon. I just really want to live in DC with my friends. I know that there will be options to get scholarships down the road, and maybe even if I get on the ball now I could get some lined up for the fall. I just want it sooooo bad. I didn't realize how much I wanted to go there until I found out I got in. I am now sitting around waiting for my S-Bahn buddy. I checked last night, and there are 297, and it has taken us 2 days to go to 9 stations. I guess we just have to start going to more things a day. Suzi is going to come visit me on Monday. She just called me and told me she wanted to do something before she has to get back to work, so I hope she has fun. Yesterday, I went to a station that was next to a playground (that was really cool, and had a Buckyball style rope thingy and a bunch of exercise equipment/kiddy playground stuff) and a cemetery. We went inside and found out that the Brothers Grimm are buried there. We also found a haunted house made out of an air-raid bunker.

New people are here. I am exploring Berlin.

Yesterday a bunch of new people came to the program that I am in here. They are going to study here this semester and leave at the same time as I do. I met some of them and hope to get to know them and make some new friends. A bunch of them are from GW in Washington, so if I do end up there, I might know some more people in the area. I also started working on my goal of visiting and exploring the area around every subway station in Berlin. A girl in my program is doing it with me. Yesterday we went to a couple places, and decided to pick up something from each station. It was really fun, and I am looking forward to doing it again today. I thought I would also share something with you all about Berlin that I love: the Museumsinsel (Museum Island). My mom and sister didn't get to see it while they were here, but it is one of my favorite things about Berlin. There are a bunch of Museums on this island, and they are building and renovating more all the time. In few years it will be all done. I really envy the people who will live in Berlin in 2007. So much will be done by then, because the World Cup is here in 2006, and the tourists will be gone after a while, so the people will have this really cool city just for themselves for a while before the next wave of construction starts.

I can't think of a title.

I have been writing a lot of really serious stuff lately, and I wanted to just talk about fun stuff today. Yesterday I was contacted by Penn State again, and they told me the were adding 1,000 dollars to their offer to try and get me to sign their letter of agreement. It was a lot of fun to have someone so interested in me, and I am really starting to get excited to go there and help them with research. There isn't really much of a chance of going to Georgetown now, but if a miracle happens and they offer me a lot of money then we will see, but I am just happy that I don't feel any regret about how this all has worked out so far. Anyway, I didn't want to talk about this, what I actually wanted to mention today was my sister. I haven't gotten a chance to talk to her in a while, but I am super proud of her. Right now she is going through the same thing as I am but with about 13 Law schools. They don't tell their applicants anything until much later, so she hasn't heard from any of them yet. Right now she is going to Middle Tennessee State University. She is also the Head of their student run record label Scared Rabbit (I think that is the name. There are not a lot of things on the internet about it. What's up with that, Ryann?) I just think that is really cool. She makes me really proud.
I thought this was a fun link.

Click it!

Green isn't a color, it's half yellow and half blue. It's blueish-yellow, is...is what it is.

I guess I will write twice today, 'cause I am on a rant. I am now going to go off in a different tangent though: Gender Identity. I think it is odd that we think of the world as split up into male and female so rigidly that we are willing to base our laws on that belief. Here are some other categories that only have to do with gender identity, not sexual orientation.

"true hermaphrodite" - label used in medical literature for persons having a mixed gonadal structure, (ovo-testis, or sometimes one ovary and one testis).
"pseudo-hermaphrodite" - label used in medical literature for all other intersexuals.
"full-time transvestite" - a person who presents themselves as their non-birth gender in all aspects of their life
"part-time transvestite" - a person who presents themselves sometimes as their birth gender and sometimes as their non-birth gender
"male to female" (MTF, M2F) - describes sex to gender; an individual with a physically male body, who identifies mentally as female; it is considered rude to refer to a MTF as a man who wants to be a woman, because a MTF considers themselves a woman
"female to male" (FTM, F2M) - describes sex to gender; an individual with a physically female body, who identifies mentally as male; it is considered rude to refer to a FTM as a woman who wants to be a man, because a FTM considers themselves a man.
"post-operative" (post-op) - a transexual who has completed sex reassignment surgery (SRS)

If you toss in male and female that adds up to 9 legitimate and distinct gender categories (12 if you count part-time and full-time transvestites as well as post-operatives twice; once for each birth gender. 10 again if you decide not to separate part- and full-time, but at least 7). I know that it would be difficult for our culture to treat these categories as equal to the 'big two': male and female, but only because of tradition and relative numbers. It would be unjust to say that the fact that we can't cope easily with these people is their fault.

To say that only couples that include one man and one woman can get married, than you restrict 65 other two-person gender identity combinations from that same right. How can we tell a person that since they aren't a man OR a woman, they can't get married. We can force them into one of those catagories, but that has proven to be dangerous and painful for many. Forcing some children to choose genders has in some rare cases led to VERY surprise pregnancies. I guess what I am getting at is that we should be at a point in our societal growth where we can move on, and change how we view the world. Now if you toss in Sexual orientation, that just adds more ambiguity to our ideas of what gender means and how we fit into the scheme of things.

Preachin' to the choir

I know that pretty much everyone that would ever read this has an opinion of gay marriage that is very close to mine, so I don't have to really convince anyone of the needs for gays to be recognized as equal to straight people. I guess the only thing I think people need to know about my opinion is I believe that the push for civil unions was well intended, but not enough. Civil unions should be for all American citizens. We have done a commendable job at separating church and state in many parts of our government, but failed spectacularly in others. Marriage is one of the later. Why do we allow such an important facet of our relationships with each other and with our religious establishments be so inertwined with our government. The only real way to solve this problem is to kill two birds with one stone: have only civil unions recognized by our government, and allow every couple this right, meanwhile allowing people to find a church to marry them if they feel the need. A church marriage would mean nothing to the state and a civil union could mean nothing to the church. While I am on the topic of church and state I just want to mention one thing that always bothers me: as an atheist, I hate that 'In God we trust' is on our money, and I will never back down in this regard, but I am at a loss as to why the largely Judeochristian citizenry of our nation allows their God to be put on money in the first place. Neither Jews or Christians believe that God was in favor of honoring money, and some very orthodox sects are reticent to even write the word 'God' at all. Why aren't people mad that their god is being used as a tool to legitimize a secular financial system? Back to Gay Marriage. Many people believe that it would undermine the family values that have been a part of American culture for so long. They have two reasons this is bad: #1. American Children growing up in households without both genders represented will be unbalanced, and #2. Sanctioning homosexuality is going to lead to ever-increasing amounts of sexual deviance. I don't understand these arguments. When my father died my mother wasn't forced to remarry. My sister and I were not taken from our mother and placed with a family that could represent both genders as role-models for us. We were left where we were. I know many bad parents who are not interfered with in their parenting by the state and many inmates on death row, people who our country had deemed unfit to live in and interact with society as a whole, were allowed to both marry and procreate. Why are these killers, rapists, terrorists and torturers deemed fit parents, while people who engage in (sadly, in some states only recently) legal sexual activities are not. As for #2, growing acceptance of gay relationships in the past decade have also come hand in hand with a decrease in homosexual promiscuity. Giving these people a sense of legitimacy has lifted an oppressive mentality that kept them from healthy, open relationships. As seen in the example of the US military, where a don't ask don't tell policy forces homosexual relationships to remain secret, we can see an ever growing trend of sexual abuse caused by both gay and straight soldiers. Anyway, that was a big rant. I hope you had a good holiday weekend!

Brazilian politics

I watched a movie last night called Brazil, by Terry Gilliam. He also made 12 Monkeys and Time Bandits, and was one of the comedy troupe Monty Python. The movie is about government in the near future. It speaks of terrorism and bureaucracy, as well as government cover-ups and consumerism. It is a great movie and it makes me think. Bush is coming to Mainz tomorrow while touring Europe to reconnect with the EU, and I don't know exactly how I feel. I really hate his politics, and I hate his business practices and big business ties, but I recently heard a section of a taped conversation he had while fighting for the republican presidential nomination, and he says that he is afraid that the religious right won't back him because he won't bash gays. He says he would not "kick gays, because [he is] a sinner. How can [he] differentiate sin." Now don't get me wrong, I think that his policies have not been good for gays in America, but I am, more often than not, failed by politicians in my own party in that regard. I guess I was just struck by the fact that the mistakes he makes, and the people hurts might really have more to do with his religious beliefs and stupidity than actual malice or greed. On another note, I went to the movie with a friend of mine who is a professional anarchist. He is really different than me, and I like talking to him because it challenges me to look further to the left for inspiration and insight. I often did the opposite when I was at home in Minnesota: I would change my car radio from NPR to the Christian station for about a week at a time every two to three months. I encourage everyone to do stuff like this. It can give you a lot of good ideas.

cum laude/ warming up to Penn State

I just sent in my Application to graduate, and I realized that I will graduate cum laude. That made me happy. I then realized how hard it must be to get a magna or summa cum laude. There are people out there that work so hard and I wish I was one of them. I know people like my sister and some of my friends seem to get themselves so motivated and going. They blow me away. On another topic, I am getting used to the idea of going to Penn State and am ready to turn down Georgetown unless they offer me a whole lot in the way of aid. I like bigger schools, and Penn State is definitely that. They also have a student film group and a Sign Language organization so I will be able to do those things there too. I also know that it will be easier to stretch a dollar in State College (that is the name of the town where Penn State is) than in D.C. and they really seem to want me, which can't be bad. PSU also wants to help me if I decide to do a Fulbright and I would get to teach German in their Undergrad Department. It seems like the pluses are now on the side of PSU. I am glad that I started to keep this journaly/blog-thing, because it has really helped me while making this decision.

Penn State wants to give me money!

I was offered a position as fellow at Penn State today. I am still not sure if I am going to take it. First of all I still don't know if I will get into Georgetown (my only other choice left) or if they are going to give me any sort of financial aid. If they don't help me financially, it would be a lot of money to give away, but I still don't know what to do. Again, I guess I will have to wait to hear from Georgetown. I have until April 15th to get back to Penn State, so I at least know by what time this decision will be made.

Whittling down my choices!

I just got an e-mail from Berkeley, and they are not accepting me into their program. I guess I don't really care, as I stopped thinking about them as an option a while a go, but I hope it doesn't bode poorly for Georgetown. I am right now in a boarding school in Gmunden Austria with some friends of mine. I was supposed to be back in Berlin (Home Sweet Home) but my train was so late that I wouldn't have made a connection to get home, so I decided to hang out with than for a little while longer. I am still waiting to sign up for spring semester classes (I am hoping to get into Latin, German, Spanish and Linguistics as well as maybe one more language). It seems like everything is going to come to a head all at once. I guess I will have to wait until I know everything about school next year, and then just spend one long night deciding what to do. Along with all of this I have to try to figure out if and how I am going to work at Concordia Language Villages again. On a different tangent; I like a song that has just been redone, and I feel like it kind of describes how I feel lately:

Father: It's not time to make a change
Just relax, take it easy
You're still young, that's your fault
There's so much you have to know
Find a girl, settle down
If you want you can marry
Look at me, I am old, but I'm happy
I was once like you are now
and I know that it's not easy
To be calm when you've found something going on
But take your time, think a lot
Why, think of everything you've got
For you will still be here tomorrow, but your dreams may not

Son: How can I try to explain, when I do he turns away again
It's always been the same, same old story
From the moment I could talk I was ordered to listen
Now there's a way and I know that I have to go away
I know I have to go

Father: It's not time to make a change
Just sit down, take it slowly
You're still young, that's your fault
There's so much you have to go through
Find a girl, settle down
if you want you can marry
Look at me, I am old, but I'm happy

Son: All the times that I cried
keeping all the things I knew inside
It's hard, but it's harder to ignore it
If they were right, I'd agree
but it's them you know not me
Now there's a way and I know that I have to go away
I know I have to go

Ishmael is not a book.

I just saw a thing on the internet where a person said there favorite book is Ishmael, and it reminded me of when my sister and I were reading passages out of it. It is awful, and not a book. If you want to read things that can help you live life in a different way, and to stray away from the pattern of those who came before, read an actual BOOK. Ishmael is not a book so it doesn't count. It is also written horribly: dialogue no one would ever exchange, characters that don't make sense and a plot that doesn't matter. Ishmael is not a book. It looks like a book, but when you open it up you will find that it is just a bunch of pieces of paper with words on them that are stuck together on one edge in numerical order. Ishmael is not a book. This is the first negative thing I have put on this blog, so I am hoping that no one is offended, but Ishmael is not a book.

Hey! Someone else reads this.

I didn't realize that other people read this. That is so cool. Maybe this will really work out as a way to keep in touch with the people who are important to me. Now I just need to get my family reading this along with a couple more of my friends. I really feel like I am starting to get a hang of keeping in touch with like my core 10 or so people in my life. I have been keeping better e-mail contact with Suzi, Matt, Pat, and Jake, and my family seems to be impressed with me keeping better touch with them. I wish that I could see all of you more often then I have in the last few years. It seems like the only constant person that I have around is... Well, me. But I think about you all the time. I am so happy that Matt is so successful, because I know he works hard for it like all the freaking time. He thinks he is being lazy, but his being lazy is what other people consider hard work. He is very much the renaissance man I wish I was, and reminds me so much of my father it freaks me out sometimes. Suzi seems to finally have all her ducks in a row, and even though everything isn't easy for her right now she is being her own source of happiness. She is so inspired to do good for all of us, and we are lucky to have her out there somewhere caring about how everyone is doing. Jake is getting married to a great girl and they are so much in love. I don't know anyone else as absolutely caring and uplifting as Jake. I have never heard him say a single word that was uncalled for or unkind. And pat is so absolutely funny, that I know that I can be satisfied that I am at least a little funny, because I can make him laugh. He inspires me constantly, and I wish I could have him around me all the time. The same goes for all of you, and many others. I am just really lucky to have had you all. Wow, this has turned really sentimental, but I guess I was just really happy to see that Matt was actually reading this stupid stuff I have been writing. Anyway, I am having a good day today after having done a phone interview with a woman at Penn State. I guess I am more sought after than I thought. They might be giving me a lot of money to go to school there. Keep your fingers crossed (I had to uncross mine to type this, so I need to make up some of the lost time).

I love Switzerland, Pennsylvania, Pat and Jake!

I have decided that I love Switzerland. I went there last weekend, and I fell in love with it. Oh! I also got in to Penn State. They might give me some money, so I might end up there because of finances, but I still have to hear from the other two schools, but I am now almost certainly not going to be in Minnesota next year. I know that There are at least right now, only about two people who even read this thing, but I want you two to know that I really miss you , and all the time I think about giving up school and just coming home this summer and hanging out with you guys. You have become my best friends and I know it took a lot of effort on your part to keep in contact with me, and I just wanted to say that I really appreciate it. I decided that I like having links in my stuff so, I guess I also Love links. And weird stuff.

The Short List

Since Johnny Carson died yesterday, I have decided to post a list of public figures I admire to share with people:
Buckminster Fuller
Martin Luther King Jr.
John F. Kennedy
Bobby Kennedy
Jimmy Carter
Franklin Roosevelt
Andy Kaufman
Rene Magritte
John Lennon
Dennis Kucinich
George Washington
Robert Mcnamara
Massouda Jalal
Johnny Carson

One of my idols died today.

Johnny Carson died today at 79. I loved to watch him as a child, and have already missed his presence in the media for years. I hope that everyone gets a chance to see recordings of him. He was an amazing entertainer and an amazing man. I don't want to write to much about it, because I have more to say than I think anyone wants to hear, but I will mention this one thing: Johnny Carson is the instigator of the worlds longest sustained audience laughter on television. I have many people I look up to, but Johnny Carson was close to the top of the heap.

My, my, my, my, my boogie shoes

I was not let into a really classy club in Berlin last night because I had tennis shoes and jeans on. I was invited by some friends who didn't know that there was a dress code so I wasn't upset or anything. It kind of sucked, 'cause I had to deal with a really annoying friend-of-a-friend beforehand and then it took me a long time to get home with the train. I am supposed to meet with somebody tonight, but I don't really feel up to it so we'll see if my phone doesn't accidentally turn off ;) Right now I am listening to a singer Called Kellie Lin Knott on my ipod. She is a daughter of one of my mom's coworkers, and I got a cd of hers as a gift once. She is really good and I wouldn't be surprised if she makes it 'big' or whatever, but I think I must listen to her music more than anyone besides her studio techs and family and stuff. It is really a soft kind of music and I just find myself never skipping it when it comes up on my ipod. I also used to have it playing in my car in the cities all the time. I wonder if she will ever know she has someone listening to her stuff here in Berlin.

MLK

Today is MLK Day, and I think that it is odd how the world uses this day. I just watched a group of people protesting Stuff and using Martin Luther King Jr. On their signs and stuff. I thought, "How can these people presume to know what he would have thought about whatever random socialist thing they are talking about." I guess I just think people don't remember what an amazing person he was, a man of both incredible success and failure. For, although he did to change our world for the better he is the only black man to whom a holiday is given in North America and Europe, and the only one for whose holiday a stock exchange closes outside of Africa. He has become an exception to the rule, and misunderstood as well as underestimated by all races that make up the United States. He was unswaying in his optimism and swathed grace, as well being irrefutable flawed. I listen to his famous speech that needn't be named (it again is the world's most listened too black spoken word recording). I think of this day as a time to reflect on the injustice in the world and how we contribute to it and fight against it. What are we willing to change in our lives? Would we really stop shopping somewhere that contributes to the evil of the world today? How many people of different races do we really count as friends? How much plant killing, resource wasting beef do we eat? There are so many things we could do to help the world that we can't see the forest for the trees. I know that I fall far short of my own standards of righteousness, but I hope to reflect and better myself today. I also think it important to reflect on other civil rights leaders that do not get recognized with their own day of remembrance.